Getting married is a huge step for any couple, and not something that should be entered into lightly. That much is simply common sense, but then in the mad rush of love, common sense is often not the highest priority. It shouldn’t be that way, for quite a few reasons.
Love is one of the most complex emotions. In fact it’s so complex, some scientists aren’t even sure if it really exists at all (but that’s scientists for you). It seems fairly certain that love does exist after all, but the truly deep, enduring kind of love is actually quite rare, which is what makes it so special and so sought after. Of course you and your intended may believe that you’re among the lucky few, but statistically the odds are against that being the case. It’s fantastic if your love story can last a lifetime, but it’s only sensible to take appropriate precautions “just in case”.
One of the reasons why most people have concerns about bringing up the idea of prenuptial agreement is that it seems cold, unromantic, and distrustful. Yet in fact it can be a positive thing if it is approached in the right way and with the right spirit. Why prenuptial agreements have gotten bad press in the past is usually because some people approach them in a very mean-spirited way, using them as a blunt instrument to force the other person not to put the marriage in jeopardy.
Oceanside prenuptial agreement experts Fischer & Van Thiel caution against rushing into creating the kind of hardline agreement that sets very heavy and unrealistic conditions. Many lawyers will happily draw up such a contract for you because they’ll get paid for it anyway, but the value of that contract may be seriously decreased if it is inherently unfair.
A good lawyer will always advise you to frame a prenuptial agreement in a way that reflects the correct state of mind for a couple who are about to be married, and this of course is one of mutual concern and respect for each other. Draconian prenuptial agreements are wide open to challenge in the event of a divorce, and there are numerous grounds upon which an appeal can be founded.
Without the help of a knowledgeable, competent, and ethical prenuptial agreement attorney, you may well be wasting your money and time. Prenuptial agreements can be overturned, and they do get overturned. Factors that can influence this include the amount of time before the wedding that the agreement was made, the state of mind of each person who entered into the agreement, whether there was any form of duress involved, or if either of the parties withheld any information that should have been disclosed.
The importance of a prenup is that it provides a framework for what would happen if your marriage didn’t go the distance. It’s not a death sentence for the marriage, it’s more of an insurance policy, and the aim should be to avoid any unfairness to either side. Consulting a prenuptial agreement lawyer who can properly advise you on the technicalities of prenuptial agreements is a sound investment in the future harmony of your household.